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Smile - it increases your face value

A day without laughter is a day most wasted

One must learn to laugh on himself then to laugh on others

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A letter from an Indian mother to her son

My dear Jagjit, I am in a well here and hoping you are also in a well there.

I'm writing this letter slowly, because I know you cannot read fast.

We don't live where we did when you left home. Your dad read in the newspaper that most accidents happen 20 miles from home, so we moved 20miles.

I won't be able to send the address as the last Sardar who stayed here took the house numbers with them for their new house so they would not have to change their address.

Hopefully by next week we will be able to take our earlier address plate here, and that our address will remain same too.

This place is really nice. It even has a washing machine, situated right above the toilet I'm not sure it works too well. Last week I put in 3 shirts, pulled the chain and haven't seen them since.

The weather here isn't too bad. It rained only twice last week. The First time it rained for 3 days and second time for 4 days.

The coat you wanted me to send you, your Aunt said it would be a little too heavy to send in the mail with all the metal buttons, so we cut them off and put them in the pocket.

Your father has another job. He has 500 men under him. He is cutting the grass at the cemetery.

By the way I took Bahu to our club's poolside. The manager is Badmash. He told her that two piece swimming suit is not allowed in his club. We were confused as to which piece should we remove?

Your sister had a baby this morning. I haven't found out whether it is a girl or a boy, so I don't know whether you are an Aunt or Uncle.

Your uncle, Jetinder fell in the nearby well. Some men tried to pull Him out, but he fought them off bravely and drowned. We cremated him and he burned for three days.

Your best friend, Balwinder, is no more. He died trying to fulfill his father's last wishes. His father had wished to be buried in the sea after he died. And your friend died while in the process of digging a grave for his father.

There isn't much more news this time. Nothing much has happened.

Love

Mom.

P.S. Jagjit, I was going to send you some money but by the time I realized, I had already sealed off this letter.

WOMAN IN DISGUISE!!!!

A middle-aged woman had a heart attack and was taken to the hospital.

While on the operating table, she had a near death experience. Seeing God she asked, "Is my time up, Lord?"God said, "No, you have another 43 years, 2 months and 8 days to live."Upon hearing this, the woman decided to stay in the hospital and have liposuction, a tummy tuck, a facelift, and a nose job. She even had someone change her hair colour. Since she had so much more time to live, she figured she might as well make the most of it.

She was released from the hospital. While crossing the street on her way home, she was killed by a car. Arriving in front of God, she demanded:" I thought You said I had another 43 years? Why didn't you pull me out of the path of the car? "God replied," I didn't recognize you."